Explaining Race To Your Children With Gummy Bunnies

Same same, but different. When my husband was traveling in Thailand years back, he saw an ad slogan for a chain of hotels that said, “same same, but different.” He chalked the oddness of it to a translation snafu, but we’ve been joking around with that saying ever since. You’d be amazed at how much it can apply to.

A couple weeks ago, when we were down South for vacation, we ordered a crib for our hotel room. As an aside, isn’t it great that hotels and motels are becoming so accommodating, so to speak? Anyway, when the woman came to set up the pack n’ play for us, my daughter was entranced.

My daughter, is naturally a tad shy, something that I don’t actually want to change because it’s good to be wary of people you don’t know. Plus, it makes my life a little easier when it comes time to talk about not talking to strangers. So, there the little one sat watching this very nice lady erect the travel bed. When all was done and I had thanked the hotel attendant for her help, my daughter turns to me and asks, “what’s the dark lady doing?”

Did I mention the woman was African-American?

I was mortified. It never occurred to me that I needed to explain race to my two year old. Yes, I knew that somewhere down the line we’d have lots of talks about race, but seeing as we live in a very diverse city, I thought my daughter was absorbing things nicely. Guess I thought wrong.

Now, I realize I sound pretty naive and stupid saying this, not to mention probably racist. Is one automatically considered racist when talking about race? Seems so. Anyway, it’s time to break out the race card and explain away.

Here’s how I’m thinking of explaining things…my girl loves her gummy bunnies. I’ll give her a handful of the chewy sweets: red raspberry, watermelon, lemon, strawberry, etc. She’ll gleefully finger each and every bunny until she finds just the right one to pop in her mouth. When done chewing, she’ll look down into her hand again, letting her fingers fall on just the right bunny then “plop” it goes into her mouth. What she is doing is deciding which color she likes, then eating that one. Oh, she’ll eat each and every last bunny, so it’s not like she prefers one over the other I don’t think.

So, my tactic is this: people are like gummy bunnies. Same skin, different color. Same same, but different.

Think it’ll work? We’ll see.