Tag: Weaning

It all seemed so harmless when she was a baby, the whole pacifier thing. There we were, fumbling around to find something, anything to stop the crying and there it was – the innocent pacifier, waiting to be sucked on.

Oh, it did the trick…in fact it still works it magic – lulling our daughter into a state of blissful calm. Only, her teeth are now moving out like a little rabbit’s; her smile each day getting more and more prominently buck-toothed. We had to end it.

So, even though she only used the pacifier at night, we took it away this weekend. All hell broke loose.

When I say hell, I mean the most horrifying, high pitched, heart-wrenching wailing emanated from that tiny little body. She kicked and screamed and arched her back and pleaded…just like an addict! It took all the courage we could muster to not give in. And believe me, it took both of us, holding hands together saying to each other, “it’s for her own good and this too shall pass.” Only pass it didn’t for like an hour. Literally. An hour of pure torture. For all of us.

Then she fall asleep. Must have tired herself out something fierce with all that. She woke up a few times in the night, remembered her distress and let us know all about it. None of us slept well. But, miraculously, the next morning she wasn’t scarred (although we’re saving up for her future therapist’s bills just in case). She was happy and hungry and her old self. That was encouraging.

So we move to the second non-pacifier night. A little protest, but her heart wasn’t in it. Oh, she made some noise, but you could tell, she was giving in to the fact that it was an end of an era. No midnight wakings, either. That night, we all slept remarkably well.

Finally, the third night. Silence. She was cured! No more withdrawals, no more protestations, nothing. Only three nights to kick the habit – way less time than I had mentally prepared for.

Yay! I’m so proud of her…she really handled everything like a champ. Now I can only hope that her teeth stop their outward migration and that we won’t be facing horrendous orthodontic bills…one can hope!

photo credit: ff137

At 21 months of age my daughter has begun eating her meals at her own toddler table. Maria Montessori calls this the weaning table and actually advocates introducing it much earlier than 2 years of age, say around 4-8 months old. The table is Montessori’s replacement for the highchair. Her take on the whole table idea is that it allows the child the opportunity to make his or her own decision regarding eating.

Independence of thought/choice is big in Montessori’s world and while I don’t know near enough about the details to discuss it in detail, I do have a post here and here on the Montessori method as it pertains to eating. I am, however, very interested in the big picture philosophy behind her method. My husband and I often fold (or one could say cherry pick) the Montessori method into our parenting style.

As for feeding time, we chose to use a highchair until we were comfortable offering Sophie the option of getting out of her chair on her own. This timing also coincided with food throwing. Really, our decision has been based on whether or not she’s getting enough to eat to sustain her growing body. However, the food throwing was a very large factor as well. I believe it is the international (and inherent) sign for “I’m all done eating this so called food.” I mean, enough with the food throwing already!

So we’ve introduced the toddler table. Sophie can sit at will and get up at will.

Disaster, you might think…but surprisingly, no. The new found independence (and no doubt trust) she feels has emboldened her to remain at her table until she is finished eating. And she actually eats! A lot.

Now, I will qualify this by saying that sitting is a loose term for what she does at the table. There is a fair amount of standing with one leg dangling over the seat, the one butt cheek on and one butt cheek off of the seat form of sitting, and my favorite the my toe is touching the chair so I’m still sitting form of sitting. Ahh, that lesson will have to come in time. Maybe when we introduce table manners.

The table, though, has successfully stopped the food throwing. When she’s done, she simply gets up. What a concept! Now, we’ve dealt with food throwing in the past and have some fairly effective methods for dealing with it while at the grown up table, but so far the toddler table is the best solution we’ve found. Granted, a semblance of toddler maturity is needed (is there such a thing?) to fully pull it off. I’m a big fan of the toddler table…in fact, I find myself sitting at it with Sophie, which makes for fun table time conversations in a language I have yet to master. I’d recommend it highly.

photo credit: ian.schofield

In our house, we decided that a pacifier was the way to go when at two or three months our daughter was having trouble sleeping.  Well, that is an understatement.  She had a witching hour where she screamed her tiny head off of a full hour, if not longer and the only things that calmed her were the 5 “s”s as advocated by the baby whisperer who wrote Happiest Baby on the Block.  One of those “s”s is sucking and after such termoil with breastfeeding we opted for the pacifier.

Cut to our daughter now at almost 2 years old and what is her most dominant feature?  Her pacifier.  We call it a chewpete (from the spanish word for sucker that I’m certain I’m not spelling correctly).  First off there is absolutely no sleeping without 2 of them – one for her mouth and one for her hand.  She doesn’t keep it in all night long but she needs it right there next to her.  Unfortunately is acts as her lovey as well.

Second is every other time of the day.  It all started innocently enough.  Sophie was allowed her chewpete at night and when she hurt herself.  Then we moved and all of the upheaval surrounding packing and moving affected her so we gave it to her when she was distressed throughout those days.  Then she got really sick and it was one of the only things that calmed her down and, while she was vomitting and so unhappy I didn’t have the heart to take it away.  But now she’s all better and throws a fit when she doesn’t have it unless she is really distracted, like on the playground.

I’m just so unsure of what to do now – do I go through the hassle of weaning her or simply deal with it until she’s ready to part with it?  And, mind you, she does have the personality that leads me to believe that she will one day wake up and be done with it…she’s shown similar fortitude in the past.  Unfortunately I think her father, her grandmother and I have become as addicted to it as she is as the chewpete calms and quiets her.  Not a bad thing when you’re out grocery shopping and the waterworks start to flow.

I never considered I’d be a mom who allowed a pacifier and yet here I am.  Just one more instance in a string of things that I didn’t know that I didn’t know.  Now I know and I’m at a loss as to what to do about it…